Hallmark of Insanity

WARNING: This post contains words, phrases, and images that, while puerile and silly, are (ironically) intended for a mature audience. It should not be read by nursery-school students, individuals with heart conditions, humorless liberals, or any member of the Moral Majority. Thank you for your patience.

This is my sister Ella. You might remember her from some of my earlier posts, including Party Like It's 2000 and My Men Wear ??? or Nothing at All. In this picture, she's wearing her Halloween costume, which she titled "Nut-Ella":



In May, 2006, Ella graduated from art school with dual degrees in Sculpture and Painting and Printmaking. Yesterday, we drove her to Roanoke, so she could catch the bus to Pennsylvania. She's gotten a job at Bucknell University, where she will run the wood shop and teach a drawing class. Ella's a little flaky, so we ended up leaving the house late. After a high-speed, traffic-weaving chase up the highway, we got there as the bus was pulling out. I was preparing to park my car in front of it when Ella and the Wife convinced the driver to stop.

One of Ella's biggest concerns is supporting herself. To that end, she designed a series of unique greeting cards. She sees these as a form of democratized art that the public can easily buy and enjoy. At least, that's her story and she's sticking to it.

Me, I think they're just funny. Here are a few of my favorites:




Ella thinks that the first orgasm should be recognized as a major event in a woman's life. I somehow doubt that it's going to edge out the quinceanera anytime soon.




I'm not sure this particular card idea will really catch on. Maybe it will find its niche among divorced couples.




Okay, I like the idea of celebrating the loss of virginity. On the other hand, scheduling the party might be a little problematic.




You have to admit that this one makes a lot of sense. I wonder why they don't already make "congratulations on your plastic surgery cards."




Again, an idea whose time has come.

And finally...



For when you don't have the guts to say it face-to-face. As a side note, could she have picked a gayer-looking model for this card?

In other news, I would like to announce that Serena, of Life Is Falling to Pieces is the winner of the second Porn Logic Challenge. For her prize, she may choose any of the above cards. And, as always, thanks for playing!